How I Became a Ghanaian Film Star (seriously)

When a man with yellowed teeth (mostly missing ones at that) came in to class and gaped at me proclaiming that I looked like Queen Victoria reincarnate and needed to star in his film, I did not think this guy could be serious. Little did I know that this man is the renowned theater professor at the University of Ghana, Legon. And he was in need of some Whites to play parts in his film on John Mensah Sarbe; I was to play Queen Victoria who refuses to give her royal assent on Mensah's bill- a pretty climactic scene, if I do say so, as it serves as the entire purpose of the performance.

The two Jakes and Jamie were also sought out to be a part of the play. The Jakes as extras and Jamie as Attourney General. We were given the script on Monday, and were to perform to be filmed on Wednesday. I thought this was going to be pretty laid back, so when I had two oral Twi exams on Wednesday; I sort of put the Queen Victoria role on the backburner and focused on studying. When the theater professor came in to grab me and the boys after our exam, we casually trekked up the thirty minute walk in the blazing sun on campus to be filmed. I hadn't memorized my lines and wasn't thinking much of it.

Probably was a bad decision. This low-budget historical film ended up being a bigger deal than I thought. The boys were immediately taken to change out of their shorts and T Shirts into full blown suits while four women frantically worked on finishing beading details on my elaborate DRESS- sort of resembled purple Bat Mitzvah fabric for lack of a better description. I guess I forgot to mention that I decided on this particular day I wasn't going to wear a bra; mainly as a way to mitigate the heat- and the women who dressed me informed me that "Queen Victoria always wore a bra" and were not too impressed; needless to say I had no clue what I'd gotten myself into, for the record.

We were on set for about 4 HOURS. And I was able to deliver my speech by glancing down at my lines, thank God. But no joke, I have become a Ghanaian film star and be on the lookout for this historical documentary- allegedly coming to American film festivals near you. I think we are even getting paid in some Cedis for doing it!

In other news, today we experienced our first terrential downpour. I am starting more and more to believe in God; maybe it's because of how religious it is here; but there must be a higher power that is laughing incredibly hard at the circumstances of my life. All I wanted was some guys to take more of an interest in asking me out, or being more than the band of brothers I tend to roll with- and after the overload of male attention I now want nothing of the sort- ever.

And then all I kept complaining about was how hot it was and how all I wanted was lots of rain. I now understand Toto's meaning of "I'll bless the rains down in Africa."

We got stuck under the tin roof of the outdoor cafeteria for what felt like an hour this afternoon. The rain literally looked like the scene in Forest Gump where the rain just comes up from the ground. The rain did not let up and I really haven't ever experienced rain like this before; I now know why all of the huts and stands are stilted. I'm surprised our chairs did not float away with the current. You know what the worst thing is about being stuck in a terrential downpour? Having to pee while listening to a storm and having water drip on you from holes in the tin roof and not being able to do a damn thing about it.

Leaving Accra tomorrow for Kumasi. I'm going to miss eating all of the mangos from the mango tree in my front yard. When I think back to my two weeks here, I will be taken back to my Auntie telling me that a mango tree was going to sprout out of the top of my head with all of the mangos I'd eaten at their house. I will also miss the wild (probably rabid; just avoid this detail Mom and Dad- I got the rabies shots, remember?) dog, Blessing, chained up in the yard that served as the family compost for the millions of chicken bones left behind from all of the chicken meals I'd consumed. Goodbye, Accra, a 5 hour bus ride awaits us all in the morning!